met patrick at starbucks, he's a barista, dirty blond, felt close there, mimetic, preternatural guess that he was a grad student in biochem at boston university ("mit"), proceeded to have total breakdown in front of him, hospitalized in mental ward for 3 days, returned to store, manager asked me to apologize, i froze and left, mailed apology letter, never heard from him again, self-banned from the store, saw him once since, awkwardly in shadows, shamed he was, probably has same sense of humor as me, may like snowboarding, really liked him, works hard, fucked it up, was a thalia, and a bit of a calliope, for me. bike still around. 2015.