The first time that I ever had buttsex was with Mr. Beacon. He was my social worker. After a lengthy inpatient stay on 5 West at St. Elizabeth's Hospital in Boston, I met with Mr. Beacon (MSW, LSW) as a licensed provider of social services, such as therapy and consultation. After my discharge from the ward, I met him outpatient at his office on Beacon Hill. At first, we chatted about med compliance and residual symptoms, but quickly our conversations transitioned to discussions of side effects of the drugs, such as "smoothing of otherwise hairy regions" or "testicular pain" or "enlargement of penis." While I exhibited none of the symptoms that Mr. Beacon cited, I did sustain especially lengthy erections (for hours) since I had restarted the Haldol. It had become a bother. Mr. Beacon said that if I buttfucked him that perhaps that would help with my raging boners. Ignorant of the biochemical vicissitudes of psychotropic drugs, and inexperienced with the potential health benefits of buttsex, I thought this sounded right. I accepted Mr. Beacon's invitation and shoved my raging erection up his butthole during session. Unfortunately, my erection only intensified and hardened, and I must have spent a solid 2-3 hours fucking Mr. Beacon's butthole in an attempt to exhaust my cock and deflate the erection. After I ejaculated all over the small of his back, I wanted to return to our discussion about therapy and symptoms, but Mr. Beacon said that he had paperwork to do. I tried to make a follow-up appointment for more "client-centered care," as he called it, but his administrative assistant told me that they were no longer taking Medicaid. The whole episode left me feeling dirty and bipolar. After my treatment with Mr. Beacon, I decided to start up care with a handsome psychologist (PhD!) who specialized in cognitive behavior therapy. I later revised the entire episode with Mr. Beacon and realized that I had been catastrophizing with a negative transference. In retrospect, I think of Mr. Beacon fondly and appreciated the "client-centered" social services that he was able to provide me. This photograph is from the security camera that Mr. Beacon had installed in his office "per HIPPA regulations" — ? The photograph does suggest that I am African-American. Is Andy Pink African-American? Probably. Is Andy Pink straight-up African? Definitely.