dsm-grindr

andy pink, berkshire wilderness —

from the register to the line to the wait to the door to the sidewalk to the adjacent building to you from you to you — you —

last night, amidst tears and froths, i spoke with a lovely 20 year old lad on grindr (gay iphone app, cf. other entries) — it left me in flaccid tears and aged regrets. he hit me up — why? — and i charmed him, laughed him, loved him, moved him, smarted him, spanked him — and i’m sure that he ejaculated into his budget android with the big screen with a big scream. at the start, he wanted to talk about the various pros and cons of the social welfare state in the netherlands, and also the virtues of a high end tax rate, for a 20 year old, as genuine or as farce, such is impressive protein powder to throw into the discursive blender with a tender stranger bender. at some point he asked me about my penis, i went on a bit about translucence and size (7″); he seemed to be taken with thickness (which i understand). his name was no jacques, more like bailey.

we spent a lot of time on religion playfully, he seemed to have something against the “pretentiousness” of wasps, of which i identify: unitarian. i would agree — we are mostly better than the rest of you, and we are the best educated of all religious denominations and sects, including jews — and i think we are beautiful, our boys, with blond hair, hairless chests, boat shoes, plaid shirts, cleanly shaven, and perfectly: smart, bright, charming, and confident. it turned out, he is a boat shoe-wearing catholic. i must say: if i were to re-choose a religion these days it would most certainly be catholicism: i need the smoke and brimstone, the fire and the evil, the saint and the punishment, the betrayal and the torture, the forgiveness and the redemption. i am down with the j-boy. i’d like to think that i look a bit like him. i’m sure it depends on artistic interpretation, but it should be asked in light of the recent debacle with jacques: is jesus circumcised? i am inclined to sadly agree: no — but, then, if jesus is a jew (and a looker of one) — then mustn’t he be cut? in any case, no matter — cut or uncut — i will forever give judas the best blowjob i can muster. judas is edgy. i like edgy. unless it’s over 26. then i’m scared and avoid. i’d like to think that judas betrayed in his late teens. i think gay slasher christian fan fiction might be my new thing. i’ll re-blog as soon as i zip up.

i will have more to say about catholicism and homosexuality at a later date — suffice it to say now: wellbutrin has not kicked in. i will try tap a tap later with more blood and guts, but at the moment i must attend to the gym and my personal trainer, whose name is kate. kate’s brother is a bio-chem post-doc at the local equivalent of yale. dr. brother is currently studying the fine irony that parnate probably causes schizophrenia. if so, it is not a far leap to suggest the obvious: lithium is cheap.

such is the post-prom!

andy

ps has anyone on here read any of the work of medieval mystics? these women wrote poetry and prose about what it’s like to taste god’s semen. it really is incredible writing, and it illuminates the sublime beauty of religious ecstasy. this is the reason that i have always maintained that nuns are the most sexualized beings in a secular world. i think catholicism is quite possibly the sexiest religion we know of — which is strange because it is so often maligned as “repressive” or “homophobic” etc. silly wasps, the reformation was for prudes.