At the Dog Park

andy pink, near you, hear you —

at the dog park this morning, there was a bit of a scuffle: i made reference to the posse about the gay manuscript and jon referred to it as "fiction" — which was presumably a joke, but in the immediate i did not understand the humor of it, which was indicated by everybody's laughter at it. afterward, i thought perhaps the joke was on my gayness, that it was a fiction or a put-on or made-up, not true, not real, and i couldn't figure out why that was a joke, or even offensive (jon apologized, and then later send me a text indicating that he had erred, mistakely joked, et al.). i bantered that i thought the joke was unkind — which was the obverse of one of the characteristics i imputed to him on monday morning, along with a paradoxical edginess — but i'm not even sure why i bothered to mention kindness, becauase as i said i'm not sure what the joke (or pretended offense) was in his remark about my fictional queerness. in any case, i responded to jon's text with a "no worries" (a phrase i rarely use), and i think it's all good in the am by the moderna run.

i think i shall continue to post regularly — hopefully not exclusively about rich — and bringing my laptop on our inaugural road trip* i'll be able to post updates around our nascent adventures on the highway stopways and the restrooms that will keep us occupied, by the by.

i didn't sleep well last night — which is not great — and it is interesting that jeff was up the whole night with me, he couldn't sleep until i bit the pillow. he is awesome. i am grateful. i have the perfect dog, even if max finally takes that encomium in the first. the diet is going well, i don't seem to be hungry. down to 168 lbs (i wonder if rich is about a buck ten), and if i can get down to 160 lbs i'll really be in fine form. connie says i look thin — i sent her a pic — so perhaps rich will take me all the same on the way down, going down.

i found it frustrating last night that while i was awake i couldn't get the various apps and surveys and polls to work on the website — i kept getting error messages or dead links, and i didn't have great stuff, but the two qizzes that i made for rich are pretty good but, more importantly, crucially informative, and should relieve his concerns about the manic depression. i can see that he would be concerned about it — it's prudent, on his part — and i am in no way hurt anymore by his rejective dig at 1369, ending our nascent affair at the start.

i cannot wait to bite the tips of rich's ears. this is one of my favorite parts of the male body. i'm sure jeff will take to rich — he's (jeff's) very kind, and affectionate, and i think they will be buds. i'll have to take jeff (and the drugs) on the road trip*, packing the food and bowls and leash, but he will do well in the back of the rental, just sitting, imagining that this will finally be the first time.

soon, andy p

I'll be able to take it