"places andy's been fucked"

people: walk on the right, pass on the left! tourists, or dreamers — it's my dying environment too!

i think that the best section of the website is the "places andy's been fucked." i reread some of those riffs and they really are pretty funny even if the texts are dated by 5-6 years. i desperately want to update (revise is too active a word) the site, even excise some of the patrick stuff, which is too much, even for me, it appears to go on forever, and no one, least me, wants to read all that sack of shit. but moving onto the website redesign is slow. i can only say that i don't have the energy to take this on, the original website took so much time.

but i think the problem this time is that no one is reading the facts, and certainly no one is present enough to be an inspiration for my internet art. i do my best work in proximity to a crush (love), watching and being watched, and this person has yet to emerge. i have found some patrons who are pretty delectable but they are inconsistent, often absent. i have basically failed to find a boy — of any type — that interests me, i have no real motivation to type the keys. this is very bad for my work, and in my teaching (22 women, 3 hetero men).

apparently, there has not been enough talking about bisexuality in the classroom. i never went through a bisexual phase, i was just immediately gay at 17, i'd like to mention that, and even insist that most people really are gay or hetero, that the figuration of the bisexual is a myth of hesitancy. (i'd also like to crack the precious goose egg that is queer.) most of the girls are bisexual ladies (most with boyfriends), so of course they want to elaborate on their sexualities. i'm fine with that, if bored, but we don't have bisexual readings for the course (there aren't a lot of texts out there, which tells you something), so mostly we talk about being a gay man or a lesbian, which really is how it ought to be. but let these young women play with both penises and vaginas (probably breasts) — i'm not one to put the kibosh on liberation. (maybe a little.)

love,

andy p, writing from the black forest, trying to settle for a handsome, intellectual, and funny boy (as i always say: 25-35). this is also, not coincidentally, what i have to offer. patrick was the best so far: click.

fuck on the right, fuck on the left, and then just fuck all night long —

love andy's left testicle

***

i'm back from class and besides saying the word "dildo" (they are very young) it was a strong class. most of our time together was small group work (excellent today) and i think i'm beginning to lose the art of lecturing, though i suppose that would be good. i very rarely lecture, though i will on monday because we are reading on modern experimental queer film of the 1960s. we will also discuss the "culture industry" theses, and a good history of art criticism circa 1960 and beyond. it will be tough for them, and i'll help.

i ordered peacock and i am ashamed. don't tell *anybody*.

dinner is fruit and yogurt and sparkling water. i should lose these 10 extra ibs in a month if i can keep up with it. this is one of those problems that doesn't haunt patrick or rich, the first because he is a dickbag science jock and keeps lean, and rich because he s just has a natural marginal body.

i used to use "mic" (mék) as a nick (like in the sign-off on email) but molly was really against it, vehemently, and i was essentially not allowed to use it. molly awowolo — at least you got the baby name right.

in better times, mic. check out that bulge!